Monday, October 31, 2005

Sometimes, it's a-l-m-o-s-t ok...

Sometimes, late at night, when the world sleeps and i pace;
others slumber and dream and i dread;
sometimes
sometimes
i get this tiny, small kernel of a feeling that everything is gonna be ok.

whether in response to an anticipated outing, or the thought of new love, or new shoes or the rest of the world getting its collective head out of its ass and globally forgetting ourselves and doing something really humane
sometimes..

I get his miniscule, microscopic, cellular , tiny, flicker, wayy way dwon deep that its all ok.

WHICHISINSTANTLYBLUDGEONEDOUTTATHEWAYWITHTHETHOUGHTTHAT:

No, it isn't. It isn't ok. This is you we're talking about, so no.
No its not gonna be ok.
Its never gonna be ok.
Not for you.
You don't ever get "ok".

Then i cry.

i wonder why it doesnt get to be ok for me?
i wonder why not.
what did I do ?
maybe if i keep
doing
it
will
be
ok.
so i circle shark-like, never resting, cant stop might miss the ok if i stop
(btw it has been confirmed by eeg that arcticnurse does not go into rem sleep)
keep moving
circle like the dark under my eyes
blank closes in, envelops
and i drift off
to a purgatory
of my own making.

Nashville Katz



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Stay tuned for

news from

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and

Dollyworld

Thursday, October 27, 2005

Thanks for the Information

Thanks for the information Never give a sucker an even break When he's breaking through To a new level of consciousness There always seems to be more Obstacles in the way Thanks for the information I know It's only a combat zone Thanks for the memory, I'll just have To carry on on my own Chorus: And it's wonderful and it's marvelous How we can ever make it through Sometimes I wonder how we can ever Make it from day to day Thanks for the information What you gain on the hobby horse you lose on the swing I like mine over easy And you can have your's sunny side up I don't wanna quibble over insignificant details And I've tried every trick in the book Thanks for the information I know I should look before I leap Chorus: And it's wonderful and It's marvelous


How we can ever make it through Sometimes I wonder how We can ever make it at all Thanks for the information Never give a sucker an even break And with her everything light becomes heavy And everything heavy becomes light They took me down to the watering hole Because I happened to mention I was dying of thirst Then they told me he who believes first will be later And he who believes later will be first Chorus: And it's wonderful etc etc.... Thanks for the information Oh never give a sucker an even break When you're on to something it's a Dime in a dozen people start Coming out of the woodwork Thanks for the invitation I know I must be on to something big Everytime I take two steps forward I end up having to take three back Chorus: And it's wonderful etc etc.... Thanks for the information A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush Every time I'm ready for a major breakthrough I always have to think in terms of better of worse Thanks for the information Thanks for the memory

-Van Morrison "Thanks for the Information"

Monday, October 24, 2005

Rumi, Sufi warrior


I am (only) the house of your beloved,
not the beloved (herself):
true love is for the treasure,
not for the coffer (that contains it).
The (real) beloved is that one who is unique,
who is your beginning and end.
When you find him,
you will not remain in expectation(of anything else):
he is both the manifest and also the mystery.
He is the lord of states of feeling,
not dependent on any state;
month and year are slaves to that Moon.
When he bids the "state,"
it does his bidding;
when he wills,he makes body (become) spirit.
Mathnawi III, 1417-1424

Sunday, October 23, 2005


Daylight Minus Warmth= Arctic
Posted by Picasa

Howling Dogs of Snow & Ice

To all my friends and enemas:

My phone is now operational and taking calls for your enjoyment , and mine.
There is even voice mail if I should miss your little self. And if you can't call ( or don't wanna) then a lovely little email from you would be just as welcome.

This offer good 24 hours a day

As I amble through the town, skimming down Front Street, the calm and fast moving waters of the Arctic Sea sworl chunks of ice toward the pale sunrise to the south. It is 10:30 am and I am transfixed by the light. Shades of palest pink sky prove that night has fled; for the moment. There are more shades of grey twixt the sea and the sky than my unruly mop hosts beneath my hood. Strewn across the glassy, swift inlet breathe dozens of 'oogruk' or bearded seal. Dark heads protrude from their frigid lair...like so many ebony players on a mirrored field waiting for the games to begin. As they bob and tread, submerging in their sleekness to dine, I am silenced by the thought that the sea belongs to those who belong to her.

Most nights, when I work, I don't get to enjoy the rare beauty of this place. An occasional bell-clear aurora, assisting a new human into this world, or escorting an elder out, shows me the connectedness of all.
Most days, when I am sleeping, I miss out on the vitae of this frozen realm. Being here alone, save my inscrutable familiar Kody, gives me more than enough time to think, to read, to ponder. I live in what is referred to as the "20 Unit" or the 'Dog House' You can guess why. At night, the Dogs of Snow and Ice howl along with the symphony of winds. Eerie does not begin to describe it.

I have no mode of transport, save my two legs. For these I am immensely grateful.
I have no television, by choice. My media is sound and I have been delighted to stream my favorite ambient program online and reconnect with my favorite public radio station as well. I read about a book a day, and have many trips planned "outside" to keep whatever sanity I have from fleeing totally.
I suspect it will go into hibernation any day now.

Having been here for 6 months now, and having another 18 to go, I can only imagine what energies will become unleashed with the passing of moons.

I remain sober yet wary,

Thursday, October 20, 2005

COOL LINKS

http://www.newsoftheweird.com/


http://www.livejournal.com/community/coffeefilter/26235.html


http://www.tmcm.com/

WHO MOVED MY CHEESE?

Friday, October 14, 2005

Dr. Weil Hits the Big Time



Living Better Longer

Cover Story: Aging Naturally
In an exclusive TIME book excerpt,
Dr. Andrew Weil shares his secrets
for maximizing health and happiness
--no matter how old you are

Dr. Andrew Weil's Wellness Diet

Men Aging Gracefully/Women Aging Gracefully

Men / Women Aging Well
Your chance to vote on which famous
faces have aged the most gracefully


More Stories

Photo Essay
Aging WellSee our gallery of
aging famous faces

Interactive Poll
Tell Us What You Think
Who do you think is aging well?

Reader Response
Ask Dr. WeilSend your questions
on aging gracefully

Gender equality and poverty



Gender equality and poverty
Posted: October 2005
The United Nations Population Fund this week released a report titled "State of the World Population 2005." The report concludes that a key to reducing extreme poverty around the world is to promote gender equality - women and men sharing the same rights and opportunities.

Lead author Maria Jose Alcala said, "If you invest in equality for women and young people and you insure that every poor woman and adolescent girl has access to reproductive health, you're going to put the world on a faster track for prosperity and development."
Alcala bases this idea on studies by the World Bank and others in the past decade, showing that societies that discriminate by gender tend to experience less rapid economic growth and poverty reduction than societies that treat males and females more equally.
According to Alcala, from 1965 to 1990, countries known as the Asian Tigers -- including Taiwan, South Korea, Hong Kong and Singapore -- had rapid economic growth. International experts attribute part of this growth to policies that encouraged more girls to go to school -- increased access to family planning -- and opened up more job opportunities for women.
Alcala said, "Progress for women is essentially progress for all."

And then there's....


PAY DAY!









I'm a pig for pesos!

Sunday, October 09, 2005

sometimes it just hurts

this too , shall pass.
degas
Posted by Picasa

Saturday, October 08, 2005


Knowing
Posted by Picasa

'we speak of knowing something when we succeed in linking a new perspective to an already existing context'
-Carl Gustav Jung

frontispiece quote from richard bone's CD 'distillation"
www.mkmk.com/bone/

Friday, October 07, 2005

til death us do part...


...well that's what I thought anyway.

This...this ...institution of marriage , a patriarchal value imposed onto women to "protect" us ( from what- patriarchy?? Ourselves? ) ...is it outdated? Who the hell was it meant to benefit? The children? Methinks it was intended to (oh insight!) to control "evil women"...note the current day inflammation of what other topics inflame passions so as love and marriage...
Well, besides money in our bass -ackwards society, but that's another rant.

Infidelity? (insert double standard here: stud if you are a guy, harlot if you happen to be cloven not clubbed)
Same-sex marriage? ( who CARES which way you face when you are having sex???)
Abortion? ( Since when is it YOUR business what I decide with MY bearer of life creatrix womans body??)
Can you imagine if gender roles were reversed??

My idea of death being... cessation of breathing, no EEG waveform asystole- true livor/rigor mortis physical death.
Warm and dead. Nurses know it by this value.

Death, however as defined in Webster's is " the act of dying".

So death could be emotional ( hay, I am a woman) spiritual intellectual, philosophical, or social principles.

How does love enter and exit this equation? What was I expecting? What does anyone expect?

That you would be there always. Regardless...
How realistic was that anyway?

Its late, I am fragged. Work is the other ethic I have left.
My Smoo sustains me.
Maio and ciao,
the frigid ice queen of the north.

Thursday, October 06, 2005

Surely there must be at least one ambient music/goddess lover

Somewhere?
Somewhen?

Give me dat ol' tyme religion...
*sigh*

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Goddess Worship

Goddess worship in ancient times:
Circa 35,000 BCE saw the emergence of the Cro-Magnon people, the first recognizable humans. From then until about 8000 BCE, our ancestors organized themselves into hunter-gatherer societies. Humans alone have developed the realization that their life was finite; that they would all die. This resulted in the development of the primitive religious beliefs. Societies which relied mainly on hunting by men naturally developed hunting gods to worship. Those in which gathering was more reliable generally created vegetative Goddesses. The importance of fertility in crops, in domesticated animals, in wild animals and in the tribe itself were of paramount importance to their survival. The female life-giving principle was considered divine and a great mystery. Some Goddess statues still survive from this era. One web site contains photographs of Goddess statues from circa 30,000 BCE to 1987 CE. 1
It is important to realize that many of these findings by archeologists and historians are speculative in nature. For example, the interpretation that the old European culture stressed the female as divine is largely based on the number of carvings of a female shape found from this era. Some point to the relative lack of equivalent male statues as evidence of a Goddess culture. Others suggest that the female statues might have been the old European culture's equivalent of modern-day erotic photographs.
This "old European" culture lasted for tens of thousands of years in what is now Europe. They generally lived in peace; there is a notable lack of defensive fortifications around their hamlets. As evidenced by their funeral customs, males and females appear to have had equal status. Many historians and archeologists believe that:
Their society was matrilineal; children took their mothers' names.
Life was based on lunar (not solar) calendar.
Time was experienced as a repetitive cycle, not linearly as we think of it.
Many academics believe that the suppression of Goddess worship in Western Europe occurred a few thousand years BCE, when the Indo-Europeans invaded Europe from the East. They brought with them some of the "refinements" of modern civilization: the horse, war, belief in male Gods, exploitation of nature, knowledge of the male role in procreation, etc. Goddess worship was gradually combined with worship of male Gods to produce a variety of Pagan religions, among the Greeks, Romans, Celts, etc. Author Leonard Shlain offers a fascinating alternative explanation. He proposed that the invention of writing "rewired the human brain, with profound consequences for culture. Making remarkable connections across a wide range of subjects including brain function, anthropology, history, and religion, Shlain argues that literacy reinforced the brain's linear, abstract, predominantly masculine left hemisphere at the expense of the holistic, iconic feminine right one. This shift upset the balance between men and women initiating the disappearance of goddesses, the abhorrence of images, and, in literacy's early stages, the decline of women's political status. Patriarchy and misogyny followed."
Goddess Worship during Biblical times:
Further south, as Judaism, Christianity & eventually Islam evolved. The Pagan religions were suppressed and the female principle was gradually driven out of religion. Women were reduced to a level inferior to men. The God, King, Priest & Father replaced the Goddess, Queen, Priestess & Mother. The role of women became restricted. A woman's testimony was not considered significant in Jewish courts; women were not allowed to speak in Christian churches; positions of authority in the church were limited to men. Young women are often portrayed in the Bible as possessions of their fathers. After marriage, they are generally viewed as possessions of their husbands. Yeshua of Nazareth (a.k.a. Jesus Christ) rejected millennia of religious tradition by treating women as equals. Women played a major role in the early Christian church. Later, epistle (letter) writers who wrote in the name of Paul, started the process of suppressing women once more.
A feminine presence was added to Christianity by the Council of Ephesus in 431 CE when the Virgin Mary was named Theotokos (Mother of God). But her role was heavily restricted and included none of the fertility component present in Pagan religions. A low point in the fortunes of women was reached during the very late Middle Ages, when many tens of thousands of suspected female witches (and a smaller proportion of males) were exterminated by burning and hanging over a three century interval. Today, respect for the Virgin Mary as a submissive mother is widespread, particularly in Roman Catholicism.

Monday, October 03, 2005

Flow Goes the Universe Posted by Picasa

Flow Goes the Universe

Check out the ethereal music of Richard Bone.
Viva ambient.

http://mkmk.com/bone/